There's an interesting post from Kaif. He wrote a hypothetical letter to Christian Girls on behalf of Christian Guys that he knows. Interesting stuff as you can tell from the quote :"....I don't know where to begin. While your Godliness attracts me, sometimes it scares me. I always hesitate when i ask myself "Can I match up to your Godliness?" or "Am I Godly enough for you?" The reason why churches are so filled with girls is because girls generally take God more seriously than us guys"
Do the guys really think that way?
Well, to add to
V's nicely worded hypothetical reply :) , here's my irreverent take :
"Heya Christian Guy,
I know you are a regular Joe Sinner. Guess what? It takes one to know one. I am not a shining paragon of goodness either.
It's no secret that you struggle to like women for more than their looks. Actually, Thank you for the encouragement that you are persevering to change that aspect of you. You don't know how much it means to us girls. Really. What we witness in a image-mad society can be really discouraging to us girls so knowing that there are some guys who are trying to change that is pretty good to hear.
As for your being intimidated by our zealousness or commitment to ministry, don't be. The Christian life has never been about godly doing but godly being. It does not matter to God if someone is serving in 4 zillion ministries while the other has yet to decide which ministry to get into. The important thing is whether both have their hearts sincerely set on changing their lives to do godly work. There is no superduper checklist to fulfill except one - do you believe there is a God who can change you? do you believe there is a Christ who can save you from your long struggle against yourself?
If God is doing His good work in you, one day you will be leading and serving God as you imagined you ought to be. Trust Him. Don't worry about "losing out to the girl" in minstries....it's not important. He will help you be that Godly Man you wish you could be.
Also, your fear to ask a girl out is understandably real. But that sneaky little Bible declares "Perfect Love drives out fear". If you understand how eternal God's love is, and you trust this love will brace you against anything life throws at you, then what's going out on a limb to ask a girl out in the larger scheme of Things To Fear In Life? :)
Seriously, remember that same Love of God has saved the girl as well - if she truly is as godly as you think she is, she will not be scared of dealing with any changes to come in the friendship you share as well. Even if rejection ensues from your decision to ask her out, God's love will protect you both from irreparable harm. Truly.
Just one last offside remark - many of the girls are MORE than happy to be asked out. So, if you have already ensured you are asking the girl out for the right reasons, what are you waiting for?
The ball is very much in your court. It has been for a very long time.
Go for it, man. We are all rooting for ya.
And if you need help from any of the gals to help out with your prospects (prayer, godly advice, date etiquette and fashion tips hehheh ), we are all a call away i am sure. :)
In faith,
The SIngle Christian Girl Collective"
Hehheh. That was fun. MGSR-y (TM The Moth) but fun.
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5 comments:
I was just discussing this with a friend last night. My friend thinks that its not so much of the men being intimidated. The fear of rejection is probably more than the feeling of being intimidated. (We're refering to our church men here :P) I wonder if it is true....
that was an awesome response neonangel :) right on the spot!
another possible fear: having whole grp of church girls know Mr A asked Ms A out. if things dont go well, that whole grp of church girls will know/label/judge/ostracise/run from him.
so girls need to act responsibly & maturely too. we shdnt tell whole wide world but be discerning & protect the reputation of the dude as much as possible.
actually, why can't the girls do the asking?
on another note, based on my experience, for the last one month, the guys who asked me out are non-christians and are not from ARPC. I wonder why? really. are the guys from ARPC pickier than the non-christians or what? It makes it so difficult for us because these non-christians are cute and they are a lot more aggressive. sigh....
eternal: i hear ya! :) it's quite a bummer when non-christian guys are the ones who keep hitting on you and the christian guys are the ones who are in hiding. As for whether gals should ask the guy out...camps are split on that one. :) my unhelpful guess is, given a choice about it, all girls would much rather that the guy take the initiative.
pearly: i agree...i think us girls need to be loving towards our brothers, and refrain from gossiping or backbiting. we should be encouraging them in their walk and their search for their gal.
it can be tempting for the christian single girl to get bitter and judgemental, mourning bitchily about how the guys just don't get it...they too picky....they too whatever etc. not edifying lah. :)
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