made 2 new avatars! here is the unglam, chor lor one and then there is the glam glam one for later. meanwhile...posting the big mouth one because...it's a nice day! :)
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met TissueAunty again after work and I told her how our DG prayed for her on National Day. :) She was really delighted! She laughed and said, "No wonder today get up so happy!"
She started sharing with me about how God was looking out for her - apparently some other person walked past her at the crossing and offered her a place to stay for $250 (compared to her present place at $700). The problem was that she was short of $50 to make up the first month's rent.
Now, the moment she named the $50 I knew this was totally God being funny, 'Cos on National Day, Island and me were talking about how to get TissueAunty a better job.
Charity, after all, has a limited effect. - everyone at the end of the day wants dignity and a sense of ownership and pride about their life. We could not just keep visiting ad hoc and bringing her freebie dinners. It would affect anyone's esteem at the end of the day to just receive and receive without being allowed to give back.
One option we examined was getting her to come clean my school once a week for market rate of $5 per hour....so we calculate calculate, came up to $50 a month.
So hearing the magical coincidental number 50, I told Aunty she did not need to be pai seh about borrowing money, she could earn it instead by helping me clean the school since I rarely had the time to do so myself.
After our first meeting, I tried calculating various scenarios of how much she makes an hour selling tissue. $1 or $2 per hour? The gap in earning power really literally chills my snotty middle class mind. Like Island mentioned in her blog, the thought that it took her 11 years to pay back a $3000 debt just floors your imagination. It brings tears to your eyes that what could have taken you a month to earn, took 11 years for another to rake up. Let's not even talk about the bigwigs who earn $3000 just drawing a single breath. gah.
ANYHOW, THAT WAS NOT THE COOL PART.
Cool part is after I talked to her, I crossed the road to take a 12 and was promptly stopped by a strange man. Now I have many many stories of meeting strange men on streets with bizarro stories, so I was a little wary of this one.
He was in his 30s, and spoke as if he had a speech defect. Every word that tumbled out sounded like it was crafted with supreme effort. He stuttered quite badly and it came out as heavily accented English smattered with Chinese. Despite all that, there was no mistaking what he was saying.
"Sister, who do you believe in? Are you Christian?"
"Yes I believe in God. Why?"
"You go church?"
"Yes I go ARPC."
"Good. good. I see you talk to the auntie. I always stand here. John 3:16. God tell me to talk to non-christian. Tell everybody about John 3:16. Tell people about God"
"That's great, uncle. The aunty there also Christian."
"Ah good! good. Then I talk to someone else. God bless you sister."
"God bless you too, uncle"
He continued standing at the crossing, contented. I was glad. Glad that he had found the one God who would not judge him for his awkwardness, his stammering strangeness. Glad that he found the God who could see something in him that nobody else in our perfectionist society could...a God who chose this guy of all people to share the gospel.
That man - like TissueAunty - had conviction, heart and a gutsiness that went beyond intellectual BIble smarts. That is sure sign of the Spirit of God working its way in the faithful believers.
Sometimes when I look at people like them, I understand another dimension to "Blessed Are the Poor, for theirs is the Kingdom of God"
Compared to the rest of us, these poor people whom we pity....they are the ones who see the hope of God with the greatest clarity. They understand with every fibre the need for His Kingdom to come and HIs will to be done.
We have so much to learn from the boldness and endurance of the poor in the face of suffering!
P.S. Anyone who can offer Aunty a part-time cleaning job, let me know ya?
P.S.S. Aunty is coming with me to church this Sunday! Wah Piang eh. Whoohoo!
P.S.S.S. Doing this ministry to Aunty thingamajig is actually making me a lot more open-minded and warmer-hearted about ministering to my own mother. I think God is being his usual sneaky self here. More on this another time...
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1 comment:
hey greengreengrass,
i am not sure who you are...would rather do this in person but since i may not have the privilege, i will just use cyberspace for now.
I may be wrong, but I am guessing these questions are all questions you face personally now? I do sense a lot of pain, sorrow and anger in the questions you pose.
I don't want to trivialise your struggles. The questions you pose are all very real poignant ones.
Everybody - Christian or non-christian - struggles with the question of suffering...Does God care? Is suffering random? Why do the good suffer? Why the hell should anyone be happy when things are clearly sucky?
From the past entries I have written about my own life, I think you can see I have struggled and still struggle with these questions as well. I don't like trite, rhethorical, flowery "overly church-y" answers to my problems and I suspect neither do you.
I have many hopes and prayers that have not been answered. I have never been attached, single for all of my 28 years and very possibly more to come. I have a permanent physical disorder brought about by my own stupidity. My parents fret all the time about my strange career choice and income level. Still - clearly, my problems pale next to Aunty's.
You are right to say that not all Christians will see answers in this lifetime, on this earth. I don't expect that. Neither does Aunty from the conversations I have had with her.
But the hope offered by Christ has always been in the Kingdom of God, which will come beyond this lifetime, beyond this earth.
Seeing as to how many of your questions are personal ones, I think it would be best if we met face to face or at least email to email. I would love to talk to you and pray with you if you are open.
I feel this medium of blogging/comment forum is not the most conducive way to address the stuff you want to address.
You can reach me at yin@school-of-thought.com. Let's talk. I do honestly want to. :)
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